worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
