i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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