Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
