why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
