so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i just google imaged poop.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
