i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
