I don't think brook has ever known best
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Randomize
