I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
That's intense
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
