Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
