We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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