bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
is it fun? or sober?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
