ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
