Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I DEMAND FORESKIN
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
