i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
