im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
