Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
So much Jack, so little girl.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
