I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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