btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
