YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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