I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
