made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
