I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
My vagina just recognized that song.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
