Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
