She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
