Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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