And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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