do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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