Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
love makes seman taste better
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
