matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
