So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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