hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
