Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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