I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
