whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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