After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
