I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
