tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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