it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
