I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Ketchup is God's man juice
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
