piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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