Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
