I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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