we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Randomize
