then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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