4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
