you win again, gameday.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
