Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
