how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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