"it" just moved
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
