dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
